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When choosing between opportunities, I have been finding it hard to accept either answer out of fear it is the wrong one.

I have developed the bad habit of thinking that some decisions are going to make or break my career and am finding it hard to diverge from this kind of thinking. It is important to make forward-thinking choices but when decision-making becomes a stressful process, things get harder to forward-think about.

It is the little decisions that build up too, like should I move house this semester, should I go for that job, should I go on exchange? And now with the prospect of a really exciting opportunity around the corner which might take me away from my family and friends for some time, I am left wondering just how important every single decision is? 

If I decided not to go, because the time wasn't right then would it ever come back again? How do I know if the time is right? 

I think one of the biggest problems is the expectation for decisions to be made in such a short time frame. I like to mull things over in the shower, on the way to university, anytime except when someone is staring at me and expecting an answer. Maybe that is just me though?

At this rate, I am not even 100% sure what I should eat for breakfast tomorrow!

I hate the feeling of dread and expectation that hangs over me when it comes to these sorts of things. But mostly I hate the fear of making the wrong decision. My little brother said to me when I spoke to him this week, "well, whichever one you choose you will never know what the other would have been like, so is there any right or wrong decisions?" and I think I am going to let that philosophy guide my life, even just for a little bit.

I always find that talking to family and friends helps. But this time I am going to make an even bigger step and for the first time at university I am going to head to Career Services and get some expert advice. Stay tuned for part 2!